Dear Busy Mom, Start Here
❤️ A Letter to Your Heart From Mine
The goal here is to allow you to see into what my intentions are for the time you so graciously give me through newsletters, emails, podcasts and a future community. You’ll get a glimpse into the experiences I’ve had that qualify me to guide and support you on your own journey, in which how you manage your home is a part of.
The Facts
I’m currently 52 years old. My children are all teenagers right now. Three children ages 17, just about 16 and 14. I’ve been married to my current husband (it’s my 3rd marriage) for just about 17 years.
I “retired” and became a SAHM in 2016. I had worked primarily as an Inventory Control Manager. I was responsible at one point in my career to keep over a hundred million dollars worth of product organized. Organizing is kinda my thing.
The Feelings
As a career woman, some might of said I was ruthless. Perhaps not the nicest of nice. I had the ability to think logically at a detailed level, but I was driven by the pursuit of perfection. My career was my life. It was what kept me going. It was where I could hide when things felt hard at home.
Perfectionism worked great in the workplace at that time. It helped drive good bottom line results, but perfectionism didn’t translate to personal life in the same way. The bottom line results were poor and the costs were big. Everyone lost.
Perfectionism caused me to live a life in fear of being found out. That I wasn’t actually as good of a wife and mom as I was an employee. When the striving became more than I could handle, I would lock myself in my bathroom and sob uncontrollably, but only when I knew nobody could hear. Nobody could know.
The Big Change
Somewhere in 2015 I got involved in an MLM and though money would never actually be made, the community aspect was so beneficial. At the urging of a friend in this community I began listening to podcasts. The podcasts grew to listening to books on audio. These things began to change me and the way that I looked at myself.
More than anything I became aware that I was sabotaging my own peace and joy.
I began to realize the level of damage my pursuit of perfection was having on my relationships with my husband and children. I felt so alone in everything because of my own actions and my own thoughts.
The awareness pushed me to continue reading, researching and studying what I could do to change my mindset. Over time my mindset did shift away from pursing perfection. Instead, I began to pursue knowledge and ways to implement what I was learning whether it was different parenting techniques or how to give myself a break.
My confidence in my own knowledge grew in how I managed my home. I began to believe that I was actually a pretty good mom and wife.
The Bigger Change
While I was just beginning to shift my mindset, our puppy of only 2 weeks unexpectedly died. This event is pertinent because it brought the kids and I to start going to church. I’ve always believed in God, but didn’t understand how that could actually impact my daily life. I would have termed myself as a ‘lukewarm’ Christian.
Church is where I met my dear friend Sarah. She helped me develop my relationship with Jesus.
I learned that the only way to bring true peace and joy into my home was to continue developing my relationship with the Lord.
The time I spent on reading, researching and studying coupled with growing my relationship with the Lord is exactly what has changed how I live my life and how I feel about my life.
I am not preaching from high. I mess up all the time, but now I know how to handle it. My home is not magazine worthy, but now I know that’s OK.
Am I Qualified?
Only you can answer that question based on what I’ve shared with you.
What I know about managing my own home is that there is nobody on earth that can manage it the way that I can. Nobody knows how we live our lives day in and day out. Nobody knows what we’ve been through or how we feel about certain things.
The pressure that our society puts on us as moms is immense, but it just does not have to be that way. We turn off the outside pressure and look to how God made us to determine how best to manage our home.
Why Beginners in Home Organizing for Beginners?
I chose ‘beginners’ as a way to describe how I felt in managing my home after having kids. It’s how you may feel even though you’ve been working to organize your home for years.
I’m expanding ‘beginners’ to also describe how you may feel in your walk with the Lord, lukewarm, as I’d termed myself too. Maybe lukewarm Christian fits.
What I know to be true.
Finding peace and joy in your home doesn’t just come once you are able to manage it all effectively. The true peace and joy comes in that relationship with the Lord. They go hand in hand. Do the work and have faith.
James 2:26 NIV
As the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without deeds is dead.
What It Means for You
This means for you what YOU want it to mean. What I want for you doesn’t necessarily matter. Does it?
I am committing to you that I will listen to your challenges, your experiences, your wishes for yourself, your family and your life.
I am committing to support and guide you in the best ways I know.
I am committing to share my heart and my experiences.
I am committing to teach you, brainstorm with you and be your guide in how you manage your home.
I am committing to support you in growing your relationship with the Lord.
Your Next Step
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I pray that you feel seen, heard, cared for and loved.
Tammy